By Paula Carlson The Leader

When Jas Cheema’s 11-year-old daughter walked down the aisle as a flower girl at the wedding of her uncle Paul Cheema and Shemina Hirji, she felt like a princess.

“She said it was a dream come true. She said she always wanted to be a flower girl,” said Jas Cheema, Paul Cheema’s sister-in-law.

Now, the little girl sometimes doesn’t want to get out of bed.

“For kids, he was the best uncle in the world,” said Jas, who has two children. “He brought them presents, took them to movies. He took (my daughter) for a manicure,” Jas told The Leader Monday, a day after Paul Cheema was released from police custody.

His father drove Paul from the family’s South Surrey home where he has been staying to the police station Saturday. He was released without charge Sunday afternoon.

RCMP Cpl. Dale Carr, who would not officially name the man arrested, is calling the man the “primary suspect” in the July 5 killing of Hirji.

Police said he decided not to speak with them.

“He met with his lawyer and exercised his right as a Canadian not to speak to the police,” Carr said. “Subsequently he was released from police custody and our file is continuing to be investigated.”

Paul Cheema told police at the time that three men broke into the Burnaby townhome he and Hirji shared, and killed his wife and beat him.

Carr said police have been unable to determine the veracity of this account.

“Police, so far to date, have not been able to substantiate the claim that there were three home invaders – the three suspects. We were unable to substantiate their identity or substantiate that they existed.”

Jas says the stress of the case and the intense media scrutiny is tearing both families apart.

She has taken time off from Surrey Memorial Hospital, where she is manager of cultural diversity services. She writes a monthly column for The Leader and also leads workshops on eliminating racism from the workplace. This week she received a worried call from a client wondering why she is in the news.

“I don’t even want to go outside anymore,” she said.

Particularly hurtful is the misinformation being circulated, Jas said.

Contrary to other media reports, Jas Cheema’s family played a key role in the couple’s wedding, with Jas asked to MC the event (she declined).

Her husband Bob did not attend, but both the bride’s and groom’s parents were there. Since Hirji’s murder, Jas and Paul have been to visit Hirji’s parents “every day,” she said.

There was no controversy over the couple’s different religions, Jas said – Hirji was an Ismali Muslim, Paul a Sikh. The newlyweds were more concerned about how relatives would react to their cohabitation. Paul and Hirji lived together for two and half years before their marriage, Jas said.

Hirji, a principal at A.H.P. Matthew Elementary School in Surrey, knew about Paul’s criminal record, Jas added.

In 1995, he was convicted of kidnapping his former fiancé after the planned marriage, arranged by his parents, fell apart.

But Hirji loved Paul and agreed to let her well-educated family believe he was an insurance agent instead of a truck driver to help facilitate acceptance, Jas said.

“She was an important part of our lives,” Jas said of Hirji. “She was a sister for me, a daughter for my in-laws.

“Right now my heart is broken.”

The elder Cheemas had planned a special party for Hirji when she and Paul had returned from a planned honeymoon, purchasing two gold bracelets to present to their new daughter-in-law.

When the bracelets were re-discovered in some clothing at Jas’s home this week, the family was once again overcome with grief.

On Friday, Jas was tasked with picking up the wedding photos, and was crushed by images of the happy newlyweds.

“They only had eyes for each other,” Jas said.